The Story You Never Wanted to Read

Once upon a time there was a princess.
and she lived with a dragon. (fully aware this is not a sentence)
the dragon was so studley it actually hurt him, but he loved her more than words, or fire could ever express.
Unfortunately, this princess was not pretty enough for the ever so studly dragon, and could not bring herself to hindering his potential of finding a gorgeous princess.
However, what the princess didn't know was that the dragon was legally blind, and her apparent lack of beauty made no difference to the feelings he stored deep inside his armoured chest.

And then one day, a man invented 'brail for humans, not words' and delivered it to the door, causing the dragon to 'brail' her face, and it had a huge zit on it.
Fortunately for the princess, the dragon needed a daily dosage of puss in order to cure his blindness... that was ironically temporal, therefore negating the need for brail on her face in the near future.

So, the princess decided to make dinner for the dragon consisting of only poison pea pockets.
The reason she chose to make him this dinner is because she desperately wanted to re-enact the closing scene of "Romeo and Juliette" with her true love.
As Mercutio she decided to cast the molding jar of hummous to be the actor.
She wanted to re-enact the modernized version of the play and when the time came to "make out" with the molding jar she had to plug her nose and smooch away.

And seeings how, Mercutio was her cousin, her mother killed him and ate the hummous.
the mother then started shaking violently. She was turning into a dragon!
This was a good thing so then the dragon could then have the original of the ladies!
but he was still in love with the princess, and he could never love any other.
So the princess fell in love with the dragon that was so passionately in love with her.
and then a strange thing happened. The moon slowly faded into the starkness of the night while casting its shadow delicately upon the two undaunted lovers.
There were mini crabs that then came from out of no where and began singing, "shalalalalal EAT THE GIRL!! shalalala,"

And as a off-key seagull swooped down to pluck her life from this planet, the dragon snatched her first and launched powerfully into the crisp, clean, autumn air.
Finally, a woman was swept off her feet!
and she loved it... but as they were soaring gracefully through the still air, the curse was broken... the dragon became a handsome prince, and they both tumbled into free fall screaming relentlessly.

But, the man was amazing so of course he had an umbrella in his back pocket and they gracefully soared to the ground landing in a pool of spaghetti.
but the spaghetti was in the bowl of the Giant of Juniper Pass, who was about to lower his gigantic spoon in the bowl for a bite to eat.
The prince then screamed up and asked, "Do you have any alfredo sauce to go with this?"
and the princess said, "if you think i'm going to be doing all the cooking in this relationship you can think again!"
Well, we'll just have to take this giant home with us to cook then won't we?

"yes, my love" she replied, "we can get him to do all our cooking while we gaze into each other's eyes and sing 'For My Love' to each other all day and night."
Hey, why don't we just stop by B.D's house on the way home, and let her sing while we gaze for a ridiculously long time into one another's eyes?
ya, that's a great idea honey. i can't believe i called you "honey"... that must mean we're... in LOVE! ! !
for my love
THE END

I'm sorry you had to read this if anyone actually got this far. This was a story written by mindless msn'ers one night.